I remember in the early days of my residence in this wonderful area of Greater Manchester, being invited to the re-opening of the Three Arrows in Pilsworth near Heywood, which is part of my CAMRA branch area. Quite a countrified part of this world really and I recall, as I was going to have a drink and therefore not driving, leaving the car at home and hoofing along country roads to Heywood in my suit. I also remember being ticked off in this Lees pub for wearing my Higsons Brewery tie. Well, it was over 25 years ago, standards of behaviour and decency were much more rigidly enforced and they were, by and large, much more innocent times.
Alas no longer. The current tenant of the Three Arrows is being dogged, by, well, doggers. Seems like this quiet and reasonably isolated neck of the woods is an ideal spot for it. Now unlike my dear friend Tyson of this parish, I'm unfamiliar with such terms, so turned to the Urban Dictionary for enlightenment. It speaks thusly: "This is where people meet up in car parks and watch each other having
sex. Sometimes other people join in, but it's mainly about watching and
getting off on it!" Well I never. I doubt if such things ever happened in Dumbarton in my youth and certainly I didn't come across anything like it in Liverpool when I was there - and trust me anything went in Scousley - but hey, things change and seemingly it is a widespread thing. Doesn't sound that much like fun to me, but who am I to judge?
Unfortunately what one might regard as a harmless enough, if somewhat unusual and eccentric pastime, has a darker side. The discarding of unwanted associated items. This is what is getting on the nerves of the landlady of the pub. Seems your dogger likes to chuck away "Condoms, underwear and baby wipes". Not so nice at all for the landlady having to clean such things up. Seems too your dogger, probably as you might expect, is somewhat brazen in their activities, being undeterred by CCTV or, indeed, daylight. This kind of brass necked conduct has narked the landlady further, but thinking on, it does kind of go with the territory, but nonetheless I agree that she really does have a point that must be addressed.
So this is a plea to my dogging readers. It isn't smart and and it isn't clever. Pack it in.
If you want to read the full gory details have a look at the Manchester Evening News. There are some less than helpful suggestions and poor jokes on Facebook here.
Heywood is also known as Monkey Town. You can read all about it in the Knowhere Guide.
A bit of a CV. Tandleman is a veteran beer lover, local CAMRA Chairman and activist, beer writer, beer reviewer and pursuer of all things good in beer. He lives in the North West of England and London. Despite his CAMRA membership, he does not limit himself to cask conditioned beer, though he believes that cask conditioning, when done correctly and appropriately, brings a quality to beer that is hard to equal by any other kind of presentation. He is a strong supporter of Northern methods of beer dispense and avidly detests poorly presented beer and dislikes pasteurisation. He regularly visits Germany, has conducted corporate British and German beer tastings for CAMRA at the Great British Beer Festival where he has worked for years on Biere Sans Frontieres and was Deputy Organiser at CAMRA's very successful National Winter Ales Festival in 2009, 2010, 2011 and 2012 and at the Manchester Beer and Cider Festival from 2013 to date. He admires good brewers wherever they are and has travelled extensively in pursuit of good beer to drink.
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